(An ongoing series of snippets overheard on the streets of Katoomba)
This was relayed to Maggie Mocks by parties unknown (you know who I mean, of course).
Recently, Colonel Farquhear was in the upper echelons and higher strata of the Mountains region, namely that area closest to the clouds,Mount Victoria. There, on a particularly festive weekend in May, he encountered Queen Victoria (or a reasonable facsimile thereof) and aMr. Brown (a likely pseudonym if ever there was one). The Queen was moved and chose to pass a motion, as it were, to reward the Colonel for his renowned and respected service with Her Majesty's Government in the Near East, the Far East and lots of oddball little places inbetween that nobody's ever heard of.
The Colonel was dubbed and knighted, (or was that, drubbed and benighted, one can't always read one's own writing these days) and a portion of the ceremony was recorded thus:
Her Royal Highness: Kneel!
The Colonel: Your Majesty, at your service.
HRH: Rise, Sir Colonel Reginald...or is it Colonel Sir Reginald Farquhear??!! Tell me, Brown, what's your opinion on this?
Mr. Brown: Weel, I dinna kin the ins 'n' oots of etiquette thet well, but I suspect it cud be Colonel Sir Reginald Farquhear, Ma'am. And anyways, ye dinna want him tay get too beg fuh hes boots, would ye now??!!
HRH: Quite so, Mr. Brown! Oh, if only you could have been Prime Minister. (To the Colonel) So, it is, rise Colonel Sir Reginald Farquhear, Royal Camel Corps (retired).
The Colonel: Yes, Ma'am, thank you most profoundly, Ma'am, I....
HRH: Alright, that's enough. Now go away like a good fellow, I need to have my afternoon nap.
So, there you have it. A noticeably pithed Colonel, cloaked as 'knight', 'dressed' by a Queen, and 'ayed' by a Mr. Brown..........or, something like that.
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